and a happy lunar new year/Muharram to you

yay for channel 5 for realising pple loveee the Police Academy! they are playing the not so nice episodes though.. the 2nd one must be the funniest.. Hightower is such a gentle giant! anyway, had dinner at some Middle Eastern restaurant at Arab street. I think I will die if i had to eat it for the rest of my life haha but otherwise just to try it once in a while, is nice.. The beans are overwhelming! haha.. BUT nice nice ambience and.. sat on the floor to eat/lounge like so:

Forgive the real cheesy posing haha.. anyways, besides the ambience, the waiters were pretty cute too :) the Head waiter downstairs was incredibly handsome! and there was another with curly hair tt had a striking resemblance to Orlando Bloom haha.. altho with an arabic twist haha.. and others were nepalese haha.. nikhil-like??

haha when we were leaving, we could hear the azan from Masjid Sultan and with the right ambience, it transported me right back to Turkey cos I totally love the fact that you can hear the azan from wherever you are. and when we were walking down Arab St., I realise i've never explored the eating places before and at this particular cross-road the feeling of being a tourist in the middle of the kusadasi night scene in my favourite part of Turkey totally hit me! Felt a little confused because i didn't know whether it meant tt the place had become too touristy or tt i never appreciated what i had right at home before. in any case it was fun cos I was the local tt blended in and i get to scoff at the tourists walking by wondering what each food name means haha.. I definitely need to travel more! For fun, i decided to make a timeline regarding all of world's history all inclusive of jewish, christian, muslim, greek, roman, ottoman history and see how everything overlapped.. There's this site which is incredible, with little titbits of everything! and damnn.. i just figured that so much of world history took place in Turkey.. My favourite HAS to be Ephesus.. Temple of Artemis, the Grand Theatre. it felt like a movie set and I dont think i can still grasp the fact that these things existed since u had to use BC!! one of the great ancient wonders of the world.. its more like legend than a real existence! haha.. and kusadasi was beeeyouuuutiffooll. hopefully i get to visit it (and Ozzy!) again.. loves it!

anyway, just to end off this post with a bright blue eyed leopard.. :D looking so innocently into the camera, when he actually screams when u dont give him attention, sits on yr notes to demand it and bites my laptop for god knows what reason! But thats ok.. cos he's still a darling kitty tts so cute when he does tt, who can resist? :)

You Should Learn Portuguese

Muito legal! For you, learning a language is all about the lifestyle that comes with it. And Brazilian beaches, hotties, parties, and soccer matches are just your style.

What Language Should You Learn?

Wee! cudnt be more true!!!

You Should Drive a Saturn Sky

You're sleek and smooth, and you need a car to match your hot persona. Besides, sometimes you want your top up - and sometimes you want it down.

What 2007 Car Should You Drive?

*drools*

thnx dee haha got it off u!

lazy dayy

mannn.. i have got to stop wasting my days!! and of all the days i need to start reforming.. its CNY haha.. hmm mebbe ill put the thought on hold then.. :D

went to school for the travel club thingy.. excited to start subcomm.. cool seniors.. and i just realised tt the president is Nadia! RGS track senior.. u know the same batch as Maria.. Christine.. red nametags haha.. i always thot she's indo.. mann.. got that cleared up haha..

anyway, we broke the ice when we started talking abt travelling.. hmm i hope all goes well n some kind soul will sponsor my trips everywhere! interestingly, some guy 26, 1st yr SOB.. also called Michael.. how ridiculously similar is that!??! mebbe we got the wrong guy in lkc.. :P

and then happiness! when i got my 1st season Gilmore girls dvd!!! for 12 bucks!! in your face u extortive Borders and even more obscenely money hungry HMV! watched the pilot and the next episode.. wow.. Dean hasn't even broken his voice properly yet mwahah.. n rory still has some baby fat.. n the grandma looks so different!! and the granddad doesnt talk much still.. n sookie is so clumsy! and taylor hasnt appeared yet! and luke ALREADY starts liking her.. and kirk made a cameo and isnt properly in the show yet! mwaha.. so fun! i never watched the first season! this is fun! plus i changed the subtitles to spanish so i get to learn sth while i watch ahhaha... weeeeeeee!!!

ah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! what the shit!

dad walks into my room at 5am!!! to ask me to set up my laptop since our home pc is a lil screwed up.. cos he has an urgent mail to send.. but seriously dad in 3 hrs time ull be at work!
at 6, dad STILL isnt using the comp so i decided to check Arsenal match scores.. initial rxn: PHEW! 2-0! yay arsenal are thru!! then ehh.. the game is still on in extra time.. so switches on tv, HORROR OF HORRORS, i heard.. GOALLLLLL!!!! and see the wigan goal that sinks arsenal in the VERY LAST MINUTE of extra time...... are you seriously trying to give me a coronary!?!?! what the hell!?!? what did i do to deserve such a shocker!?!?! ahhH!!! i must really be a fan then cos i keep storming off and yellingggg in frustration. much to my dad's horror.. whattt!!?!? a true fan doesnt sit there n laugh haha arsenal is in suuch a rut.. are u TRYING to rid me as a fan!?! as u can tell.. at 640am in the morning, only the pple overseas are online and emotions running high.. i cant go back to sleep anymore.... andrew's prob gonna be the first soccer person i see later today.. he will so hear the brunt of this vent!!! ahhh!!!!

sometimes i wonder if i made the right choice
i still wonder if this is it for me
truthfully im not doing great or love what im doing..
at this pt in my life.. shudnt it be abt either?
i hate falling short
i hate failing
the only real thing keeping me motivated is barcelona n the appeal of getting out of here.
after a yr, im still wondering
what if... i end it here?
what if... i swap?
would i be happier?
or will i ever be happy?

i rem when i was still in hc n contemplated shifting to rj, pple were telling me.. if u dont move, ull never know n perhaps that may not be as bad as moving and regretting.. but nothing ventured nothing gained no? somewhere deep down, something is screaming.. this is not right.. it doesnt click.. it shudnt be THIS hard n painful for sth u chose but i dont know what other options i have. i realise one thing.. theres a big difference between who i am and what i want to be. and i dont know if i can truly change to become what i want to be.. but for all tt ive asked for.. its to be happy.. am i? n sometimes, simply choosing to be happy isnt enough..

wee! the ending of winter sale means 1 great thing! SPRING SUMMER COLLECTION! i cant wait till Zara brings in the new stock! I must admit that ever since I visited Zara which isnt too long ago, one of the happiest days of my life is visiting there to look at the Spring/Summer collection for the first time in the year! damn bimbo but ever since myuk, gill n i invaded wheelock zara (my ultimate fav, esp with spacious fitting rooms) trying on a billion tissue skirts, i've fallen in love with the collections.. its just that my pocket isnt deep enough to sponsor half the purchases i want or the skirts are too short.. then my mom will give me the evil eye! haha.. i must admit last yrs summer collection wasnt too great.. too red indianish n boho for my liking.. tissue skirts are hot! shall go save up to have one greatt splurge at zara soon! dont disappoint me now!

speaking of disappointment, today was one filled day of frustration.. bullshit pple who say they dont have the decency of 10 frigging minutees to talk to u but its prob the time u take to go to the toilet. just say it outright man! such shitheads.. as if ure REALLY so goddamn bz! n come on.. ure supposed to be the most approachable bunch of pple in the neighborhood! nonsense.. utter nonsense! grrrrr.. -think happy thots-

rethinking my own perspective of Asia.. its normal to think the grass is greener on the other side i guess cos if people seem to be having a hell lot of fun here, how come i'm not? perhaps im too pessimistic.. n too secure in my own lil world tt i dont wish to explore Asia. besides, even a trip to Msia alone needs permission from parents. if we were the same fuddy duddy family in europe.. i still wouldnt be experiencing it for all its worth! but im so lazy to plan!! haha someone plan my holidayss n just bring me along for the ride! :D

btw.. giving Amaths tuition so does anyone still have their notes??? It'll be great if you could pass them over!!

its just a number

to my darlings!
Ouyang turns the big two zero today(Friday)! happy bday!
Em turns the same big-ness in 3 days time but we just celebrated it haha














so we're moving on from being angsty, childish teenagers to angsty childish young adults! big diff.. its only a number no?!

haha well.. ive always said, u know ure old when the hot new stars are younger than u.. look at THAT.. its theo walcott signing for arsenal.. hot new sensation who is 16 yrs old.. didnt occur to me how young tt was till i read: born in 1989!!!!! its almost a different decade already. gah!

zoom!

My LTB grpmates are a little bit insane hahaha.. in a good way..
Rem how i said i talked really fast with my exchange student? In ltb grp meetings.. its TIMES 2! its TOO MUCH!! :S ahhhhhhhh bloooddyy heell why am i always free!?!?! i ended up writing half the team charter and now im writing the new letter aaaahhhhh.. fish.. i hate writing!

2 hrs back, i left this hanging.. come back after writing the letter and whoa my fren emailed the other guy already.. THIS is what im talking abt FAST.. the prob is the initial part is sloww. and a particular person is slow.. but there are ways around such a person.. n haha no one wants to hear me nagging n pestering them 24/7.. just u wait and see!! u dawdle and ill be on yr fat ass till u feel like moving a million years away! but otherwise, the rest of them are great.. altho when i leave the chatroom for a while ill get totally lost because at the pace they talk at.. i guess tts what causes my headaches in the early mornings on mondays haha..

so much work to do.. so little time..

seriously wtFFFF

i am up to my ears in workload.. i need some venting desperately
definitely hitting the gym tomorrow

gonna appreciate some timeout at emily's on friday..

just to show how comfortable this blue eyed leopard has become!

i dont want to be an american idiot

i must have been deaf but apparently my ang moh prof said this in class after the malays didnt know a certain arts guy.. 'orang melayu pun tak tahu apa apa' ok that is serious intolerable. how dare she say such a thing. she was completely tactless regarding the korean men thing too.. im sorry Dr Sian Jay, I'm happy to say it in your face that that is bloody insulting & hell racist! I used to think feminists were right fighting for a cause.. I'm sorry to say that the term seems to be synonymous with extremist instead. you said bastard and slammed certain types of people in class.. its not even about conservative asian cultures or the freedom of speech.. its about manners and being of a status high enough to not be so crude. But to be positive, it drives the spirit to improve and rise above such minions who must have had led some kind of dreadful life to be this hurtful and angry with others. I do hope you grow up one day and realise that living everywhere and studying at Oxford does not grant you the right to slam other people.

Despite that little piece of unpleasantness, today was pretty cool. It felt like a little International Friendship Day haha.. After stats makeup lesson by a confused Jap prof with an even more confused class, had lunch at this interesting vegetarian Indian restaurant with Charis, Grace and Bingkai... its like 3 chinese n a malay in an indian restaurant.. and its one of the nicest indian food i've eaten.. that says alot cos im not a fan haha.. plus u cud decide how much u wanted to pay cos its for charity. funky. Went back to school for a meeting yes on a saturday with a chinese, another malay, a malaysian and a korean. where we decided on a presentation topic of how theres all these subtle stereotypes and discrimination going on in Disney cartoons. More American slamming mwahha.. and desperately wanted to go out, started annoying pple haha but ended up just sitting around with claire, the korean girl in skl with her fren, ola from Nigeria! a little hard to understand him when he swallows his words but he's nice! eventually talked abt how they got abt to come over (note: try not to ask cos they repeat it a billion times and its a really long story hahaha) and we talked abt the skl system, a lil bit of politics and talked to claire about exchange and found out Elizer (that ass!) also plans to go to Spain! so i decided to scold him over the phone hahaha.. but found out instead he's 1/4 spanish! what diversity! all in the comforts/boredom of home hahaha.. not bad SMU.. n i didnt have to go out with the exchange students!

i think im high on rain hahaha

feeling a lil more upbeat these couple of days.. spouted nonsense in lunchtime talk.. i hope the profs dont think im a loser hahaha.. but tt didnt seem to bring me down.. interestingly, I felt high-er cos its nice to be surrounded by motivated and funny profs.. it kinda made me feel more motivated to be someone great too.. oooh NOW i rem why i started being high.. i SAW santiago!!! on the phone with asi and then boom! mr fabregas lookalike walked over to the escalator where i was hanging around (elevators make perfect places to look for people ahha) ahaha started being all excited over the phone and im still running on from then.. imagine if i met the real thing hahaha.. hah and sarah was all no! the one she saw was the real spaniard so we argued over it.. over at esplanade looking at the dvd collections.. and back to skl when we stumbled onto her fake spaniard hahaha.. turns out i saw the real deal hahaha.. ok so exagerrated! anyway, his hair seems to have gone bushier esp his fringe! haha mebbe its the humidity.. perhaps my hair will be nice n lovely in spain ahahha.. anyway, beige sweater over berms.. doesnt exactly look like fabregas... contemplated saying his name out but tt would be too stalkerish. right? hahahha.. joked ard with sarah tt we're gonna go nuts in barca saying she'll camp out at camp nou while ill be labelling fabregas no1.. fabregas no2 etc.. :)

n today met up with denise.. kaoz i didnt know SESS has like really grreat views of the national museum! u know it actually looks tonnes better from a room in skl than when ure walking right next to it..

ahhh why did i get such slavedrivers for Block A!!?!??! I have a billion things to do and im only taking 4 modules.. bah! on top of 2 presentations for comms, for the topic on cross cultural communication they're making all the non singaporean chinese present ANOTHER on doing business in our own individual ethnicities.. wth... then chinese dunneed?? just because its deemed to be the norm!!??! just a teeny bit sore but hopefully it helps out my class participation since the TA seemed to be encouraging pple to do it.. gahhh LTB meeting tom afternoon and stats makeup/comms meeting on sat.. such a toot man.. who wants to go out!/?!!

weeeeeeeeee! twan always rubs off his excitedness on me... hardly get to see him anymore since he's so busy clubbing and what not haha.. makes me feel so SORRY tt im slacking on this spreading ass of mine.. but no link to spanish student tho.. he is very psyched up tt im planning to go to spain tho.. Perhaps itll be his holidays oh or rather he'll be done with uni by then n we'll meet up haha.. one of the grreat plans of meeting up in europe.. hahaha.. if im this high in Jan, gosh how high will I be a mth before going!!??! (i really really hope i do in the first place!)

ooh yes.. Salam AidilAdha! Pretty late for prayers at Masjid Ahmad Ibrahim and it was raining.. as usual! all packed in there like sardines.. and only like after everything, khutbah included, did i realise syahidah, the hc 1 yr senior was sitting next to me the whole time.. we got up, stared at each other and tried to rem who each other was.. haha since most pple tt i dont really know are my rgs seniors, i was right again hahha.. anyway, i love masjid AI, its a masjid kampung so its still... rustic haha.. but clean n comfy enough.. in the middle of the khutbah i felt an urge to earn alot of money and donate lots to tt masjid to build up and expand perhaps cos right beside it is some beeg church.. n i sorta love the fact tt cars line up till until 2 busstops up and down from the masjid during solat raya.. well unless im the one who is parking right at the end.. which is normally the case behh! dad came in later so he had to sembahyangnear the sheep hahaha.. i didnt even realise they were keeping sheep in the back! see.. so quiet just before slaughter! dont have the guts to see the korban tho.. so came home to watch police academy!! i love the first batch! Mahoney! Hightower! all the quirky ones.. so cute!

Mr Stray aka fat kitty aka Tiger has learnt to hush in the house so he's a nice lump of fur to have ard :) he's sooo heavvyy.. i love carrying him and he loves it too!

ok less paranoia & whining, more i am so bloody determined to get out of this island.. i swear once im off, im making my stay as long as possible! looked thru syas london fotos.. seriously its killing mee.. meeting up with friends in london.. sightseeing.. doing yr own thing.. in europe.. having yr own place.. I think the motivation has gone from 90 to 100%! im thinking of how ill feel if i were actually there.. i think ill completely flip if im actually there thinking of me wishing right now tt i was there haha.. complicated but.. oh man.. i guess anticipation is half the fun.. i hope its less tho.. :)

had my first ltb lesson today.. started out with me getting a headache from all the chitchatting.. but whoa grp was super efficient, contrary to what i thought previously.. we even decided what we're gonna do with a go-ahead from our TA.. all within 30 mins of TA time after class.. funky! i hate tt theres so much paper work tho.. but hopefully all my classes will be real great this sem.. thinking of taking spanish courses up soon since it feels rather slack anyone care to join? lessons mostly at peninsula plaza.. 7-930pm on weekdays..

*yawns* better get some shuteye or ill be late for sembahyang raya again as usual.. darn it.. it starts at the same time police academy is showing on tv! i love police academy! i would buy their dvds in an instant! well of course as long as it doesnt cost as much as a single season of gilmore girls at Borders: $69.90! crazeeee..

Ok.. this cat has taken over the house.. on Friday, this bugger first invaded in the morning when i was still all groggy.. left it alone to sleep summore and he disappeared till late night... greedy little fella ate up all the dry cat food we had and was screaming this morning away partly for food and entirely for attention.. he's most handsome and charming when he's all sleeping and QUIET..

we think he's someone's lost pet being all domesticated and attention seeking... his body is so solid that he can pass off as a young leopard or sth.. he makes walking TERRIBLY hard bumping into our legs.. forever asking for a scratch o/w he'll bite your ankle! so.. anyone lost a blue eyed little leopard?

im sad.. shower some taggy luv pls!!

2nd day of skl.. call me a nerd but i MISSSS stats.. yum.. n i think tomoki isnt too bad.. at least his notes are nice n clear.. FA today.. omg.. why didnt anyone tell me he looks like a lecherous DOM!? he seriously looks like kailyns granddad with LESS hair.. i was stoning in the last 1/2 hr cos i was amazed tt we were learning from such an ancient being.. n speaking english well.. haha. ok evil.. still! im gonna be marked down with 2 guys in my grp hahaha. but at least i like that he's really clear abt all definitions. leong was just throwing in terms after terms where until now i dont even know what 3/4 of the terms actually mean..

met junwan today! for sakae.. yum! she's so great to hang out with.. loves you! and thanks so much for yankees cap! i figure americans must have long heads cos my face totally disappears in the cap hahaha.. ill never be able to wear it on windy days... itll get blown off my head.. loves it still! :) i hate u for having ice skating as a module tho. and easy peazy mcq final exams.. BOO!

in other news, arsenal drew with manu.. admittedly, a relief.. reports seem to say cesc did a good job so ill go watch the replay.. sigh.. if epl loses its appeal, they shud all just blame it on chelsea.. arsenal cud do such consistent form in the past for a fraction of the price! they shudnt be allowed to undermine other teams buying opportunities when they have more than a full squad.. n if wenger doesnt buy anybody significant this jan, then we're deader than dead.. theres no future to talk abt when theres no present to bring us to the future..

just suck it up!!

i guess people tend to believe they have such ill luck.. i am no different haha
first of all.. went to my niece's bday party.. she's 3.. so i was stuck in hte middle of all new parents carrying their babies and all.. my hand was so sore carrying my new niece dheea.. but anyway, being bored, spotted a guy with the deepest dimples therefore the most beautiful smilee.. gah u cud just melt looking at him smile hahaha.. after like an hour of staring hahaha.. i realised wth, he's someone's bf!!!!!!! boohoo..

athen today.. being LAZY i dcided to skip tennis and swimming at safra... and hon HAD to rub it in my face tt they met my lovely Mr Red Speedos.. ok sounds porno.. forgive me hahaha.. lets just call him mr Red then ahahha.. i havent seen mr red since BEFORE chicken pox!!!! which was... feb last yr!! ahhhhhhh.. washboard abs on a fine lean body of a mat lifeguard.. the image still etched in my mind hahahha.. cud be exaggerating since i havent seen it in abt a yr.. but STILL.. dammmmnnnnnn... lesson learnt: dont be antisocial
well had fun at kai's house playing silly games so tt was what being social brings haha.. if not a hot guy.. then tonnes of fun with yr girlfrens.. :)

to add icing.. i was looking thru the pple tt im assuming i got as ltb grp mates.. and doesnt look too good.. but u know what.. life brings u shit.. 2005 so kindly pointed tt out.. so 2006 is abt being a dungbeetle and making GOLD out of it! hahha being spastic but HELL..

to 2005:
I tear my heart open, I sow myself shut
My weakness is that I care too much
My scars remind me that the past is real
I tear my heart open just to feel

to 2006:
its time to rebuild everything..
but most of all.. its to savour the anticipation of ESADE, BARCELONA 2007... :)
the dream is 365days away n meanwhile i have plenty of europe to soak in and much money generating schemes to take part in before i go..
with God willing of course.

2005 was a transition, a painful lesson.. and I hope the memories of those I cherish most always stay in my heart. i realised she was mortal too but i'd always thought she'd be there till we had jobs and perhaps even got married. It's never going to be the same ever again.